True but thats because hes a fetus.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
