I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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