I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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