So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
