there was a trapeze. enough said
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
