it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
