Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
