Duck Duck Cougar?
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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