Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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