honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
