she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
