"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.