No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
so let's talk penis.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
