You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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