when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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