Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize