I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
