My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
