I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Still dying that you shit outside
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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