Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize