I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
