do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Found your dick twin last night
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
