Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
