Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
