Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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