it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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