Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
