Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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