Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
