Buhtt sex?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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