I'm really into asian looking animals
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That's how twitter works, right?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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