I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
