Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize