I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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