screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
This is the high leading the old right now
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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