He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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