we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
