i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
