Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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