She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
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