Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
