He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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