Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
