That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize