Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize