My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize