I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
