kristin has been a bad kristin
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
No more Irish car bombs ever.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
