so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
