Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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