the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
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