Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
